fall for a stranger , scandalous❤.



mystery♥.
Nerissa Clarice Tan
13th May
Simply adores curious clothes , quirky songs and funny shows .
Oh , did I mention ? She love/hates her favourite people too
oxox

those poets♥
the secrets underneath♥


dream like dreamers do♥.
A rainbow in the sky The sound of your laughter in my ears .

just another crush♥.
This blogger henceforth shall attempt to write unashamedly, Take lots of pictures without embarrassment, And speak in a language you can understand.Not.

old records♥
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In 365 Days♥



"In 365 Days" is a photodiary I've decided to initiate, compiling day to day events with a snapshot of a moment of the day.
It is the snapshot of a minute in my life, that caught my eye, with a caption of sorts, either explaining the picture or describing my emotions.
I have been told that I never really open up myself to others, and more often than not, I leave people wondering what I truly feel or giving them confusing signals.
Thus, this photodiary, is in a sense, a window to my head.
All my thoughts, my emotions, everything I usually keep out-of-sight, will be put under here, other then my regular blog posts, which are usually not very informative.

Welcome, to the chaos and mess in my head. I hope you'd find something that speaks to you, whether to pull you through something difficult, or to relate to.

Welcome to 365 Days of my life.

In 365 Days

just ask♥

ask them questions
don't leave your answers





choreographers♥
designer
basecodes
headers
picture
colour codes


Sunday 28 December 2008

zoie

im really thankful that i called you up that day
and that you brought me to your church
you guys taught me what its like to be a true worshipper of God
and i know that it was there that He touched me

i've learnt alot from you guys
seen the different ways that can be used to worship Him
and to always keep my faith in Him even when things arent great
and i know that i can always turn to you guys for help

Cornerstone is a truly great place
and almost everyone there has that need to know Him more
but in my church, the faith is dying out in the youths
and alot of them are going to church for all the wrong reasons
i hope that you can understand why i've decided to go back
i wanna start something in my church and show them what you all have shown me:
an undying faith and trust in Him and a desperate need to know Him more

i believe that God sent me to Cornerstone for this very reason
and hopefully i would be able to revive the youths in my church
and prove to them that there is more than just this to life
i may not suceed but hey i've tried and i'll keep trying til they get it :D
support me ?? ((:


so we said; thee, thee, hear. 03:18


quiz


hi all(:
just came back from outing with cousin
lol
watched Bedtime Stories
not much of a plot but the humour is madness:D
we were laughing like maddddddddd :DD

anyways
octina aiai tagged me to do her quiz
hahahas lol

1) Who's the person who tagged you?
Octina

2) Relationship between you and her?
aiai

3) Three impressions of her?
cute happy wacky(:

4) If she becomes your enemy, you will?
no way ? hahah !

5) What will you say to the person you like very much?
lol iloveyou larhhs

6) Characteristics i like about myself?
uhh optimistic ?

7) Characterstics i hate about myself?
i keep refusing to face up to stuff ?

8) For the bad person you hate, what will you say?
i dont think i hate anyone....

9) What do people feel about you?
im always cheerful

10) Your crush?
ahahahahah ! he's too good to be true ;D

11) Pass this to 10 persons:
1. dionne
2. jade
3. shuxin
4. zoie
5. sammy
6. desiree
7. robin
8. edward
9. grace
10. xinyi

12) If 5 & 7 are together?
oh LOL that would be CLASSIC !

13) What does 5 likes?
oh that's easy ! CLIFFY :D hahahahah !!

14) What colour does 9 likes?
orangeorangeorange

15) Say something about 8.
my dearest darling wife ! ahahahah !

16) Who is 2?
my crazy best friend who always makes my day

17) Talk about 3.
sushi ! ahahah my dear bestie(: cannot live without heer [i bet she's touched now !]

18) Who is 10's best friend?
lixin ?? i think... besides me of course :DD

19) Who's the sexiest among all 10?
hmmmmmmmmmm................ it's a draw.... okay not really... my wife aint sexy.... im taling about E.C of course.... :P kidding he's sex-ay alright :D

20) What colour does 4 likes?
purple and only purple :D

21) Is 4 single?
oh definitely(:

22) Your relationship with 1?
bestie(: okay basically all of them on the list are my best buds. yeah seriously. and there are lots more :D teehee

23) Are 5 & 6 best friends?
i guess so ? okay more of a let's hang-out today friends ? ahahahah dont know but hey! they're FRIENDS !

24) 9's surname?
seow

25) 7's nickname?
sister

26) Say something to 8.
:DD iie lurbblurbb euu worx xDD

27) Say something to help 9.
hold on girlfriend ! (:

28) Who does 1 admire?
*ahem* *ahem*

29) Where does 1 live?
near ECP. its like just opposite her house

30) Does any 10 of the stated names, knw who you like?
hmmmmmmm........ NOPE wahahahahahahahah !

31) Say something to 6 when you see him/her.
fantastic four all the way manzxzxz ! hahahahah !

32) 10's spouse?
me(: ahahahahaha ! okayokay CLARENCE (: which clarence ? ahahahahahah ! that clarence :D

hahahahs that was fun
as usual if you want to do the quiz go ahead
if you dont want to that's fine by me as well

i completed two stories yesterday:D congratulate me !
after like soooooooo looooooonnnnnnggggggg i finally complete TWO stories
okayokay i re-wrote one and completed another but still :D teehee
you can go see them here

oh GUESS WHAT !
i just and FINALLY realise what i want for christmas
even though its like long over =/ tsk .
ohwell....

i wanna be kissed under the mistletoe this christmas by my one and only prince charming

teehee shhhhhhhh :D

oh P.S.
i made it to confirmation4 next year yo !
ahahahahah !
after being MIA , AWOL etc for the wole year
lucky right ?
hell yeah and thank God ;D
this whole year i only like attended 3 lessons....
yeahyeah i know
joseph is like damn nice to even let me back in
he should be demanding i start from confirmation1 again
lol so thank God he's nice :DD
how i made it in with such a sucky record ?
hehhehheh
of course got conditions
like turning up for every lesson on time....
=/
which im like so not good with
but hell im like damn heng to even get promoted
lol
and another reason why he let me back in is.........
well hahah that's between me and him :P
ahahahahahah
confirmation4 man !
im gonna get my second name next year.
like i told zoie
i want something to start in my church
i dont want my friends in there to go to church cause they have to
i want them to go cause they want to
and i want to help them see God
just like how zo and gang helped me see him
so cheers and pray hard for a revival in QoP yo !
ahahahahahahah !


so we said; thee, thee, hear. 00:12


pain, death

Thursday 25 December 2008


i remember that day really well
i just came out of the shower, my hair wet
with water still dripping
next thing i saw was my brother
his face held a lost expression and he told me, "He's gone."

i felt numb all over,
and i didnt know wht to do
my first thought was denial
i couldn't believe it
that guy who grew up with me
who allowed me to bully him
who spoilt me and let me have my selfish ways
i knew i had to go to the wake
but guess what ?

that day i had just came back from camp
so before i could even go,
i fell asleep.

afterwards was really bad
i kept blaming myself
the number of times i could have spent with him
the horrible things i've said
that i wish more then anything to take back

when he got admitted into the hospital
i never did visited him once
i always put it off
giving excuses like i had more important things to do
when he needed me the most

it wasn't easy.
it still isn't
on bad hair days, i miss him
and i still do beat myself up for everything i've done wrong
but i managed to move on
i was able to finally realize that things happen
and i learnt that a life is really precious

memories will always stay with me
the good and the bad
the joy and laughter
the fights and tears

my case may be different from yours
mine had no choice, yours did
mine had to go, yours didnt
i beat myself up for not being there for him
you beat yourself up for not noticing

he committed suicide
everyone thinks he'll just have to go to hell
after all, taking a life, no matter whose, is an unforgivable sin
but can you imagine this scenario?
whn he reaches heaven and has to go for judgement ?
and Jesus uses His blood and washes him clean

i don't know any other way to put this
and maybe, you dont really need someone to preach to you right now
but the fact still remains :
when Jesus came down to earth, He washed away our sins with His blood
likewise will continue to do so

dont lose your faith in Him
because He's with you right now
and His holding you, hugging you tight
whispering in your ear that everything's fine
it's just that everything else is flying by so fast
that you cant seem to hear Him
but i know
trust me
i know He's with you right now
carrying you as it hurts
He's grabbing your hands as you slip
and He won't let you fall
even if you do, He's going to fall with you
and He'll help you stand again

you have always seem so strong
and you still do
i look up to you for guidance, for help
for a shoulder to cry on, for a friendship that i hold dear
and when you cry it hurts
really badly
and it makes me want to take away the pain that's hurting you this way
iloveyou, girl. you're the best bigkid i can have
you always entertain my most ridiculous ideas
no matter how outrageous it gets
and whenever i get upset, i always run to you
i know i cant do much
even after all the things you do for me
i'm here for you always

for every ending there is a new beginning.
everyone falls, but only the strong ones can stand again
you're stronger than you know girl

Labels:



so we said; thee, thee, hear. 20:17



Sunday 21 December 2008

19 dec
had dinner with grandparents uncle lawrence and ern.
thn went to have ice cream at parkway thr while the elders slowly ate. :P
as usual the retards (my cousin and brother) fooled around.
after tht headed to ern's house to slack abit
cos we booked tickets for 1220 movie 'Twilight'
second time watching hahah
reached home at around 3+

20 dec
woke up at 11 and rushed to parkway
ended up for nothing cos desiree was late...
for 2 hours...
zomg. beat edward chi's record man....
so i was stoning at mos burger for 2 hours until she finally came
thn bought balloons for edward chi :DD
hurhur !
and headed down to changi
robin was already waiting for us thr

after meeting up and settling down we decided to go to the old changi hospital
LOL
desiree was so freaked-out larhhs
and i was the madd woman who lead the whole group of us
she thought i was so brave
whn actually i was super freaked too xD
the whole place gave everyone the creeps can ?
thn we realized we were getting bitten by mosquitos. =.=
so walked out to changi village to buy repellent
and ran back to meet felix.
hahah !
with felix around we finally dared to go upstairs
the first two floors were creepy like madddd
thn as you go higher it got less scary...
LOL hahahh !
we explored the whole place damn cool man !
hahah !
but the whole place was very run-down
it got vandalized by people
so the ground floor had alot of "Welcome to Hell"
or "Free Sex"
or more classic "Tampines Sec Rocks"
lols

finally around 6+ we headed back to changi beach club
and waited for edwardchi sammy and clifton to arrive

edward like already knew we were going to throw him a birthday party cans ?
he's such a spoiler sometimes
tsk.
rawr !
so ended up doing the same stuff.
cake smashed on us and him
but really unfair cos felix desiree robin and edward like totally got off clean ??
rawr !!
but we had fun lurhhs...

shall post the picture whn i get thm from desiree((:


so we said; thee, thee, hear. 14:37



Thursday 18 December 2008

today the club darlings are going to have steamboat again
and im not going
saddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddd
):
must come visit me later !
dont care you ! xP
hahahah !
ooohh ! maybe we go for supper ? :DD
yeah ? hahahah !


so we said; thee, thee, hear. 16:35



Wednesday 17 December 2008

hi all :D
im at shuxin's house now:D
yesyes im blgging at her house
she say i make her house messy
whn she also got make it messy herself
tsk .

haiis

i shall post pictures whn i reach home
yes for once i'll post pictures

sammy :
ohgurl):
dont be upset okay ?
whatever it is
you got me edward and robin(:
cheer up alright :D
i'll try to come over one fine day okay ?
thn we'll go crazy whacky happy once more
so smile alright ? :D

can i cry ?

****

right im home :D
but its the 18dec already
yes i got lazy last night haha !
so im posting today instead (:




see the mess we made
but mostly of course is HER :D
hahahah !
alrightalright
it was 50-50
so thr
i had dinner at her house
her parents bought charkweyteow for me
i couldnt finish LOL

daddy dearest fetched me home

and i watched football with him when we reached home :DD
the Singapore against Vietnam
turned out to be a draw
thn daddy said they will be coming to Singapore to play
the 2nd leg this sunday
and he asked me if i wanted to go watch
LOL ?
at first i was like stunned...
thn i said YES
ahahah !

silly daddy
tell you something
he wont let me learn skateboarding
cause he says it's too tom-boyish
but he lets me go watch football and cheer my ass out
ironic or wht ?

hahah yes my parents are damn funnnnnnnnnnn


so we said; thee, thee, hear. 19:01


for robin

Sunday 14 December 2008


you can't say you've given up on relationships
cause it'll mean you're giving up on love
the thing is
you can't
no matter what you do
how you live
how many layers of ice you cake your heart in,
you'l never be able to give up on love.

i've tried it before.
it doesn't work.
no matter how many times i try and run
it keeps coming back.
cause that's what love's about
no matter how many times you push it away
it'll keep coming back

love breaks but it also heals
and im not just talking about BGRs kind-of love
im talking about all sorts of love.
the love you have for me and sammy
that whoever makes us upset
will get it from you.
that kind-of love can heal too.

it's hard to let go
and i'm not forcing you to.
it's hard to move on
but you have to
whether you want it or not.

i'm telling you now
straight in your face
i hate her guts for do this to you
at the same time
i love her
cause i know that out of all of us
she's the only one that can make you laugh for no reason

if you're going to wait,
then fine.
i'll wait with you.
but just dont say you're going to give up on relationships.
cause it just means you've given up on love
when love hasn't even given up on you.


Labels:



so we said; thee, thee, hear. 11:12



Friday 12 December 2008


im feeling ... really crappy again ...
damn . not sick physically crappy .
more like sick mentally crappy ):
someone bring me out !
rawr !
hahah !
you knw wht ? i wish i did agree to go overseas this holiday
tsk .
ohwells
next year im signing up for the advent trip

idontwannastayinsingapore
iwannarunaway. faraway.
wherenoonecanfindme
andiknwi'llfinallybesafe


)': yes im not a happy person today
and i hate myself being like that.
yes i knw how to make myself happy again
but for some weird reason
i'd rather leave myself suffering):
dumb retarded me...

i miss grace.
i miss sammy.
i miss edward.
i miss robin.
i miss desiree.
i miss edwin.
i miss shuxin.
i miss jade.
i miss dionne.
i miss zoie.

i miss beverly.
i miss tabsy.
i miss ratsy.
i miss my imaginary friend.
)':

someone just kill me already.

tsk. hell. im even missing crazy people i dont knw well....

rawr !
i should stop here. cos im talking nonsense.
bleahhs.

i dont like him. i get that.
do i like anyone?
nope.


do i still like E?
nope. it only hurts
cause i guess im just upset that
he moved on faster thn me.

i know of a way to stop the pain actually
i'll just wipe out my memories.
just like eveything else.
sometimes, im glad that im mental
it makes everything else easier



but today i feel like im just one mistake away
from You leaving me this way


so we said; thee, thee, hear. 13:22



Wednesday 10 December 2008

christmas is cominggggggggg ! :D

santa i've been a good girl all year [yeah right!]
pretty please bring me nice presents :DD

like...
oooh !
tickets to Break Out !
Lady Sov's CD which is coming out next year(:
and ohmy
HIM

wouldcha?
i've been real good this year :D

hahahah !
right. enough of rubbish(:
butttt.... yeah i'd like them
teehee

Lady Sov changed her hairstyle too :O
she looked damn cute with her last one
this one she looks more cool
lol
go see for yourself

and Break Out ?
it's a hip-hop dance show coming to Singapore in April next year
hahahas !

him?
aww. impossible. lols
question is.. which him :DD
ahahahah !
i could have been really busy lately and snuck someone else behind your backkkkkk :DD
you'll never knw ;D
ahahah !

alright
im stuck home cos mummy and daddy wont let me go out with sammy today)))):
sorry sammy): but i can still beat clifton:P
so my plans with her are crashed
and im stuck home to rot rawr !
okay not really
i got movies to watch
food to eat and grow fat with
a dog to irritate
and a brother to bug
wow
fun:D
not =.=

my fever is almost gone
sometimes it does come back
thanks for your concern(:
grace robin edward dien
ahahah ! im so touched!

someone especially
hahah ! everyday msg to check up on me
but the rest of thm just wont believe that you're different now
another one bad-mouthing you behind your back...
he's an ass): lousy friend bleahhs !



thanks eitherways
all of you(:
even though im too lazy to reply your msg:D
ahahah !
love you guys(:


so we said; thee, thee, hear. 13:45



Saturday 6 December 2008

okay lols i've been like going out with sammy and edward alot
like seriously ALOT
LOL who cares ! they're nice funky crazy people
like me
ahahah !

anyw.

updates alright.

November

hmm sammy bowled for AIA
i didnt . lols if i did i'd be first

.
.
.
.
from the bottom up
ahahah !

so anyw, went to OCC to support her.
she and clifton were going crazy with the helium
cos thr were alot of balloons floating about out thr
and they went to suck helium
which made their voices super squeaky.
lols laughing like maddddddd thr

thn while she went off to prepare
someone offered me sweet :O
lols cos of something tht happened long long ago
(that night i was super duper hungry, plus the dinner sucked. so i was like moaning about how hungry i was and he remembered. lols until now. so ps)

lols thanks anyw alden hahas ! yes i knw your name :P

okay.
went out shopping with edward one day. (it's one day cos i forgot whn...)
to look for his dumb ipod
rawr ! he's like so bleah. :DD
joking ;D
thn meet up with sammy and clifton to go oschool
but they didnt have classes tht night
soooo
we headed to coffee bean to crap around.
thn we got bored and walked to plazasing and cathay
and finally went home.

December

had steamboat dinner with club people on the 2nd
zomg
superrrrrrr nice mans !
thanks to sheena who recommended th place
lols sammy knew it cos of clifton
(sammy is like super well-informed? cos she like know everything. LOL need anything ask my sammy) [clifton note the word 'my' :D]

Yesterday
woke up and felt super duper crappy
decided to take my tempreture...
40degress
zomg.
showered and took TWO panadol. and slept abit more
thn went out to meet dien alan and xian (is tht his name ?? lol)at sutec
i knw. damn smart. lol.
we watched four christmases
i swear the guy in the show is useless !
the dumb dien keep saying is the girl who is stupid whn obviously is the guy's fault
rawr !
so anyw,
xian went off to find his friend, me dien and alan waited on the overhead bridge for him
guess who i saw
shuxin and jade :O
lols

thn alan went home, me dien and xian go leisure
cos dien wanted to buy something thr
i saw khairul, yawter, ahmad and alot other people thr too.. lol
thn sammy called and asked me go dinner with her.
so i took the bus back to suntec... -.= hahah !
saw samantha(school one..) on the bus
met her at esplanade and waited for the chi brothers.
thn decided to go marinasq eat instead cos it was raining...
had awesome food again xD
thn headed to th club to meet my family
watched my cousins bowled.
got bullied by thm
as usual..
tsk . am i very nice to bully ? rawr !
they said my brains got fried by th fever
hahas ! bleahhs whtevr !
finally reach home around 12 + ?

Today
stayed in bed whole day.
bored to the core.
and dien is being a really naggy korkor.
tsk .
hahas !
he cursed me got dengee
thn say he will go his house opposite the temple pray for me
tsk.
lols
idiot. hahas !


so we said; thee, thee, hear. 18:07



Thursday 4 December 2008

If We Are the Body - Casting Crowns - Casting Crowns

It's crowded in worship today
As she slips in
Trying to fade into the faces
The girls' teasing laughter is carrying further than they know
Further than they know

But if we are the Body
Why aren't His arms reaching
Why aren't His hands healing
Why aren't His words teaching
And if we are the Body
Why aren't His feet going
Why is His love not showing them there is a way
There is a way

A traveler is far away from home
He sheds his coat
And quietly sinks into the back row
The weight of their judgmental glances tells him that his chances
Are better out on the road

But if we are the Body
Why aren't His arms reaching
Why aren't His hands healing
Why aren't His words teaching
And if we are the Body
Why aren't His feet going
Why is His love not showing them there is a way

Jesus paid much too high a price
For us to pick and choose who should come
And we are the Body of Christ

If we are the body
Why aren't His arms reaching
Why aren't His hands healing
Why aren't His words teaching
And if we are the body
Why aren't His feet going
Why is His love not showing them there is a way

If we are the body
Why aren't His arms reaching
Why aren't His hands healing
Why aren't His words teaching
And if we are the body
Why aren't His feet going
Why is His love not showing them there is a way

Jesus is the way


dont be a hypocrite . you're a christian for Christ's sake . we're supposed to be showing people what God can do . but look at you , one minute you're pretending to be holy , the next you're back-stabbing . you give the rest of us christians a bad name .


so we said; thee, thee, hear. 15:06