Monday 29 June 2009

11 days to the utterly consternating day

Meaning of Consternate
con⋅ster⋅nate  /ˈkɒnstərˌneɪt/[kon-ster-neyt]
Use consternate in a Sentence
–verb (used with object), -nat⋅ed, -nat⋅ing. to dismay, confuse, or terrify.

Origin:
1645–55; < L consternātus, ptp. of consternāre to unsettle, throw into confusion, perh. intensive deriv. of consternere to cover, spread (with) (con- con- + sternere to strew; cf. stratum ), though sense development uncert.

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gosh how quickly time flies
D:
received our new timetables today
gahh
imma screwed girl i tell you
tsk. dont like O's at all man

buuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuut
i need to chiong
very hard
so that i'll get good grades
and that i'll get into a good school
bleahhs
it sounds horribly disgusting
but i still have to do my best
go nerissa, you can do it!

i got confirmed on saturday :DD
hahah now im like clarice nerissa tan
LOL th name dont really appeal to me
but the others *stares at thm* thinks it's nicer
go figure.
robin was soooooooooooooooooo 'nice'
he called me up just to laugh at me -.-
cos i forgot my lines whn i went up to the archbishop
rawr . dumb sister . i hate you(:

so we said; thee, thee, hear. 20:11

Wednesday 24 June 2009

16 more days to that horrifying day

church camp has officially started
i'll be confirmed this saturday [woohoo !]
buuuuut cause of th H1N1 we cant overnight in church
awwwww D:
uber sadness
bleahhs
plus we have to go back to church by 9am tomorrow
rawr !
this morning was nearly late :O
hahah
cause th day before
me yoshi and htet watch this dumb horror flick at htet's house
and i couldnt sleep at night
so i called htet to annoy him :D
hahah !
ended up not sleeping till 3++
and waking up late
and rushing to church :P
hahahh !
today was playplayplay
tomorrow it'l get serious =/
damn. hahah !

i got freaking brilliant fantastic fabulous awesome great news:DD
hahah
unbelievably awesome thingy
hahah
im an awesome genius :D
heehee :P

buuuuuuuuuuuut
it's still not enough to make me normal again
zzz ):
im honestly dreading th day can ?
ugh. and i feel damn lonely now too
dammit
ugh. im not gonna let this get me down like that ):
dumb , i miss you . why'd you have to go and leave me like this ?

so we said; thee, thee, hear. 22:06

Tuesday 16 June 2009

24 days to that really unpleasant day

zzz
got into trouble last night
with mummy and daddy
ohman. argh. genius part is:
i still cant really figure out what i did
lol
i sound like some unrepentent kid but im not please
let thm cool down first larhhs
i escaped to my Godparents house
tonight go home thn apologise
bleahhs

back from malacca
it was as awesome as i hope it'd be
hahah
but nothing exciting to talk about
lol
other thn alot of sessions, talks
good food
average shopping
and wacky card playing
:P hahah

had dinner with yoshi last night
thn didnt want to go home early
so went to ECP to slack
waitwaitwait
i DID tell my dear parents where i was
and who i was with
AND roughly what time i'll be home
no idea what the hell happened
came home and kena whacked
bleahhs
eitherways shall apologise tonight.
go figure man... =/
i shall be a good kid eitherways :P
when i figure out what went wrong
i might tell hahahah !

so we said; thee, thee, hear. 18:47

Wednesday 10 June 2009

30 days to that day

love's like this
it can make you feel unbelievable high over the moon
it can drag you down under and make you want to kill yourself

mumsy dearest found out about my cuttings
or rather
to make it clearer to the denser people out there
me cutting myself
thanks to that ASS DIEN
argh. im like seriously pissed with him
at the same time i know that he just cares about me
but for now i just want to be pissed
cause it's like losing a part of myself
that i really dont want to share just yet
you could say losing control of my life
but hell larhhs
it would come out sooner or later

mummy didnt say anything
just said tht i wouldnt be able to wear nice clothes
cause of all the scars
i think she's at a loss too
and she doesnt know how to handle it either
considering all the crap and all
gahhh.
who'd knew that i come from a dysfunctional family

so dear reader[s]
imma cutter
occassionally hah !
trying to stop
like i promised (looks at a certain group of people)
i havent done it since..... April or so
so you could say im 'clean' for 1 or 2 months
which isn't a really good track record.
the last 'break' lasted.... 9+ months ?
hahah

first question would probably be 'why?'
my answer would be 'go through what i went through
then tell me why the hell not'
second question would be 'pain anort?'
not pain thn i do for wht ? retarded
hahah ahhh... dont know what other kind-of questions you can come up with larhhs
want ask better ask fast
last time im doing this man

once again, dien please go straight to hell
i seriously hope you're reading this

so we said; thee, thee, hear. 23:36

Tuesday 9 June 2009

was late for class today
lol but i wasnt the last
hahah bleahhs
emaths was alright
until we received our homework =/
ugh. bio as usual
listen take down notes
physics... ugh..
i recieved attitude for no reason
wth ? ugh.
lesson ended at 12.50 or so
went downstairs to meet htet and yoshi who were waiting for me
gahh not my fault anyway hahah

headed to suntec but decided not to watch movie
since retarded htet decided to go malaysia
lol i might see him thr
since im going thr on friday
hahah !
it'll be freaking hilarious ?
went to htet house for awhile
thn went to TM with yoshi
saw apathi(sp?) on th train
hahah thn reached TM decided again not to watch movie
lol retarded.
ended up just walking around till our legs hurt
thn went home
gahhh wasted day hahah !

i think i'm going to start a countdown(:
for a date thn i'm dreading, albeit possibly more thn O's
gahhhhh D:
as of today
it's 31 days to that dreaded day ):
ugh.

anywayyyy i havent been posting pictures
hahah soooooooooo ..... (:

monster teacher and her birthday card
roystennnnnn :D and frisbeeeeeeeeeeee (:
cupcakeeeeeeeeeeeeeees
robinnnnnnnnnn are you surprised ? :D loveyouuuuuuuu
at des' house singing K

so we said; thee, thee, hear. 19:07

Sunday 7 June 2009

i saw something
on a blog
or rather on a few blogs
can i say i knew it all along ?!
wt# ! argh. iknewitiknewitiknewit !
i f****** knew it !
argh !
forget it man. i wont cry cause it wont help at all
pointless man.
and honestly, even though i know i shouldnt,
i just want to screw everything and just go crazy
like what i always do
go out get drunk wake up with a hangover
but i wont
cause it's honestly not worth it.
but it still hurts
alot
=/
disgusted by you.

anywayyy
i had an awesome day with royston :D
went over to his house
but he wasnt home yet
so i did my maths while waiting for him
hahah he so sweet
knew i was thr thn bought donuts for me :DD
whee~ hahah
thn he taught me maths and english :O
finally went to play frisbee
at 4+
went back to shower at his place at 6+
thn had dinner with his family and sharon jiejie at this place called Tim's cafe at toa payoh
it was awesome man
hahah it food was great
eat until freaking full
thn sent sharon jiejie and her husband home and headed back to royston's house
whr mummy and daddy dearest picked me up
royston's probably sleeping in camp already
hahah me and him were damn tired today
thanks cousin . i'll deny it for the rest of my life but ily. hahah

htet's back from his cruise :DD
hahah now yoshi not lonely already :P
yoshi so poor thing larhhs yesterday
nobody to play with hahah !!
meeting thm on tuesday again
lol been spending alot of time with thm man....
im suppose to set a date to meet up with my sister robin too....
gah.... and i want go cut hair tomorrow ):
tsk.

so we said; thee, thee, hear. 23:20

Saturday 6 June 2009

i dont like reading or hearing about
'imissyoubaby' tht kind of stuff
its heartbreaking even though i may not know the person
its stupid cause he/she should just get over it
it's plain retarded cause i still read thm
wth is wrong with me ?
i'd like to know too
hah

and they say love's easy
obviously the retard tht said tht
has never been heartbroken before

As my soul heals the shame
I will grow through this pain
Lord I'm doing all I can
To be a better WOman

so we said; thee, thee, hear. 14:13

Friday 5 June 2009

feeling unbelievably helpless
cause someone's upset
over something
i have no idea what
and i cant do anything
D:
and it's like she was always thr for me
but now whn she needs me
i cant be thr for her
tsk.
i really hope she cheers up soon):
ily girl

anywayyyy
ugh. like downer sia infront =/
tsk. met htet yoshi and pop today
been spending this whole week with htet and yoshi
once or twice mark and pop joined
hahah
we watched monster vs alien today
cause htet had to leave early
he's now on some cruise larhhs
good life
mark going to australia tomorrow
another one good life one
apparently duc and khang left alr too
gahhh
andandand i need to catch up on my work ?
ohman i can hear dien nagging me
about how important my O's are
tsk.

tht fat asshole can msg me
ask if i wanted meet up next week
go drinking
can call the other two as well
asshole man. i really want to scold him worse words thn asshole
and honestly
i havent forgiven him about the 'virginity' comment
im only friends with him cause of someone
he is really going on to my 'group of people i really dislike' soon
ugh. i can be slow to catch on
but im not stupid
neither am i blind
i know what's he's trying to do
i know what he's up to
he aint that fantastic as everyone makes him out to be
and honestly, he's a two-faced hypocrite
asshole.
mixing with people like you degrades my standard

honestly asking
do you [you reading this now] think im wrong for cursing such a guy ?
ugh.
and i only have 2 people on my list of people whom i really dislike ?

so we said; thee, thee, hear. 22:52

Tuesday 2 June 2009

it's been a draining day
rollar-coastal ride all around
thanks to those who helped
thanks to those who cheered me up without knowing
thanks to those who tried

ughh.
somehow im still down and out
damn
it's 1.30 am
and im supposed to be asleep
cause i've got school tomorrow
plus im sending a friend off
and i've got tuition
ugh.

so we said; thee, thee, hear. 01:37