Sunday 19 June 2011

ears that do not hear,
and voices that do not speak.
and that makes us pathetic

sometimes i fear
i judge too quickly
i take it for granted
many a times
that since i'm more matured then most people
i know many things
i forget i still have a long way to go
a lot of things to learn

i keep telling others that
their eyes do not see things
not properly anyway
when that is one of my greatest faults
i thought i saw better then anyone else
and today i learnt that i was wrong

lesson learnt :
i need to slow down when coming to conclusions
i need to look harder for the truths that people hide
i need to be less judgmental like the people i condemn so

on another note though
i was listening to Lady Gaga's Judas

there's lots of hype about how
she's using God's name in vain
and how she's a devil-worshipper
and crap
well, yes, crap

at first i thought 'hmm.. is she screwing God's name here?'
until i went and saw the lyrics

it's hilarious how she puts it though
how God's love really works

Forgive him when his tongue lies through his brain
Even after three times he betrays me

which is true
i mean, he repented at the end didn't he?
and God will always welcome back the lost sheep right?

although i do admit some parts are quite wacky
like

I wanna love you,
But somethin's pulling me away from you
Jesus is my Virtue
And Judas is the demon I cling to (cling to)
I cling to

but who are we to judge?

like i say
whatever goes on between me and God
stays between me and God
i have my ways of worshiping Him
you have yours
so let's not fight over it
after all
it's the same Guy

so we said; thee, thee, hear. 01:23

Monday 13 June 2011

Didn't give you all my love
I guess now I got my payback

and now they're gone
and you wished you could give them everything

whenever i'm around you
i feel miserable
like i can't wait to get it over and done with
and go off somewhere where i won't see you

i'm miserable with you
my heart aches and my head hurts
too many questions unanswered
too many insecurities, can't trust you

today they asked me if you were my ideal guy
and i said "no"
it came so easy
without thinking, it slipped out

and before i knew it
i realized it was half-true
because i don't even know you
and neither do you know me

a week of late-night's conversation
a month's worth of meet-ups and what-nots
people don't fall that quick
love isn't something to be thrown around

i wanna start over
from the beginning
where i didn't have to worry
about getting my heart broken

where i didn't have to mind what i do
cause you weren't anyone
just no one important
i'm suffocating from all the things i can't do

how now ?
now that i've fucked up so badly.



but at the end
i wonder if you'll ever see this
or perhaps you're just like the rest
all talk, hot air, nothing done.

so we said; thee, thee, hear. 22:10

Monday 6 June 2011

if i showed you the real me
would you run away

what if
i'm really an insecure person
who's clingy and needy
would you still stick around ?

what if
i like stupid things like
reading and gaming
would you still stay ?

what if
in some ways
i have the same traits that you condemn
would you still be here ?

sometimes
we aren't careful of what we say
and we condemn people for their actions

like how some people are whiny
or how some people keep trying to catch up with others materialistically

and we dont see how
our words affects other people
and put pressure on them
not to be like that

and then these people
become so fake and pretentious
that
even they, themselves,
forget who they once were

i'm not a saint
i'm not independent
i'm not perfect

i'm clingy
i worry over things you'd never thought about
i need someone
who can constantly tell me
they aren't leaving

i can't keep to time
i get mood-swings
when i'm angry
i hate hearing the word "sorry"
when you don't even know why you're apologizing

i'm selfish
i don't like sharing things
i don't like people taking my things away
i don't like people touch my things

i'm bitchy
i bitch about everyone all the time

i'm not some great person at heart
i sometimes do things
for a selfish reason

would you still stick by me?

{note}
sometimes i wonder if
you're really listening to what i'm saying
because i keep saying the same things over and over again
but you're still not getting the message
it makes me wonder
if you were really a right decision made

so we said; thee, thee, hear. 01:46