Nerissa Clarice Tan 13th May
Simply adores curious clothes , quirky songs and funny shows .
Oh , did I mention ? She love/hates her favourite people too
oxox
A rainbow in the sky
The sound of your laughter in my ears .
just another crush♥.
This blogger henceforth shall attempt to write unashamedly,
Take lots of pictures without embarrassment,
And speak in a language you can understand.Not.
"In 365 Days" is a photodiary I've decided to initiate, compiling day to day events with a snapshot of a moment of the day.
It is the snapshot of a minute in my life, that caught my eye, with a caption of sorts, either explaining the picture or describing my emotions.
I have been told that I never really open up myself to others, and more often than not, I leave people wondering what I truly feel or giving them confusing signals.
Thus, this photodiary, is in a sense, a window to my head.
All my thoughts, my emotions, everything I usually keep out-of-sight, will be put under here, other then my regular blog posts, which are usually not very informative.
Welcome, to the chaos and mess in my head.
I hope you'd find something that speaks to you, whether to pull you through something difficult, or to relate to.
i rather die thn to take my Mother Tongue O Levels gahhhh lemme die cannnnnn ?
me and jerome (hence forth known as egoistic liar or romey) made a bet he says tht i wont make it to SP i say i will so he says if i do get in he'll give me a special and personal welcome for suaning him on msn damn talk about mean i said i'll go up to him and say 'hi' thn run like hell he said tht i should wht an ass
plus he called me an ass just to start a new topic wht an annoying egoistic liar
rawr !
hahah this post is absolutely random hahah !
so we said; thee, thee, hear. 23:16
suddenly a part-time love affair doesn't sound tht bad hahah
the problem is who to have it with
lol father simon will drag me into the counselling room if he heard
i've got O level chinese tomorrow im friggin' scared i suppose tht would teach me to be lazy and not go for the CL mugging session gahhhhhhhh anyone want to help me ?
ugh. i can feel your 'serves-you-right-for-not-studying' looks now damn cold... stop looking freaks
so we said; thee, thee, hear. 13:02
Saturday, 30 May 2009
daddy got me a new laptop :O hahah some weird brand manufactured in the UK but assembled in Singapore sooo it's supposed to be good ? hahah thankyou daddy :D
mummy bought me a new phone W905 :DD hahah talk about expensive i've beeen spending too much money this month time to stop this bad habit hahah but then again i havent been splurging recently so i suppose its forgivable ? hahah thankyou mummy
apparently my parents do read my blog that's seriously freaky ?! hah that's how my mum found out about my belly piercing too i didnt get a scolding but daddy said in this world-weary voice not to pierce so many holes and asked me to be careful and watch out for infections mummy gave me THE look gahh hahah
yes im posting frm it now its small and pink hahah baby kind-of pink and so small im having a hard time getting used to the keyboard hahah supposed to meet weiqiang and god knows who else for a chinese mugging session but i didnt feel like going i still dont sorry ):
im so in lurve with this show hahah me my brother and my cousin hahah its so cute larhhs which reminds me i need to go get the new issues of TRC and VK damn and i need to save money too gahhhhh
so we said; thee, thee, hear. 13:46
"Because, when you're lost and fallen, all you want to do, is just to run away," she whispered, letting the wind carry away her words. Her arms wrapped tightly around her, she shivered, even though it wasn't cold. Her shoulders were slumped and for once in her life, she felt like she had lost control. She didn't like it. She didn't like the feeling at all. Losing control, feeling things slipping out of her grasp. And yet, she was unable to stop it. To prevent it from falling apart. All she could do was to stare and wait, wait for everything to just disappear.
y'know, when a girl loves a guy she's willing to travel to the sun and back for him she's willing to bring the moon down to earth for him she's willing to die for him even the hardest and coldest girl is willing to do anything for her guy
but when a guy loves a girl it's a different story altogether maybe one in every million is willing to do the same for her but the rest just cant and wont be bothered
i've met afew guys who'd do anything for their girl unfortunately they're either unappealing or my best friends
i've met countless of girls who'd do anything for their guy but at the end of the day, they still end up heartbroken
so tell me why do i still believe in true love knights in shinning armour and Prince Charmings ?
because i've seen too much to not to believe in fairytales losing these fairytales would mean losing everything i have left to live for i'd lose the little hope i have left that things'll get better
i do hate myself sometimes you know contradicting myself and all sometime i do wish that i'd just leave it as it is and stop thinking so much gosh is there an off button somewhr ?
so we said; thee, thee, hear. 00:15
Friday, 29 May 2009
you know... i realise i signed myself up for alot of activities that i don't really want to go... not that im being a freak or anything i just have a sudden bout of depression and just want to emo alone gahhhhh
hahah retardedness affecting
anyway shuxin came over today:D finally spent some quality time with her after soooooo looooooooooooong hahah we baked cupcakes ! :D YES THEY'RE EDIBLE RETARD i know wht you're gonna say assssss lol we had to try quite afew times though my first try was alright but the subsequent batches were all burnt hahah until our last two batches they came out great especially the last one that one was the best ! hahah we're going to try again on friday maybe all 24+ cupcakes will turn out right :DD shall post the pictures whn i can upload them or otherwise known as feel like uploading thn upload hahah
ohohoh
HAPPY FIRST MONTH YOU ! [in advance] hahah stay happy alright ? andandand ily always ;D
last day of school monday O level Chinese faggggggggg D:
i really would appreciate it if i could have someone to talk to i really would be grateful for someone whom i can share this with
ugh. hahah im so damn tired =/
so we said; thee, thee, hear. 23:52
Tuesday, 26 May 2009
falling in love all over again teehee(:
aint it just sweet ? hah
i realized i've got alot of stuff to talk about but like most of it probably wont mean a thing to insensitive souls hahah
yeap it's one of those rants hahah
ohohoh hah got great news :D father simon made me the president of the Magnificat group lol im like honoured stunned shocked and zomg scared hahah
im worried tht i wouldn't be able to do a good job and that i'll let everyone down hahah its quite frightening but i'll try faith in Him brings no boundaries trust and faith and well... self-belief hah
go nerissa ! make this group explode !
so we said; thee, thee, hear. 22:20
Saturday, 23 May 2009
yesyes blogging three times fag i dont care what can i do ? im at CBC [read changi beach club] daddy's coaching i really dont like the idea of staring at dien while he bowls after all he did suan me for like 2 whole freaking hours asshole rawr hahah
so i can only blogggggg which is quite retarded shall go exploring after this post hahah
y'know i really dont get why retards would put 'all content found on the blog entries are copyrighted of *inserts owners' name* please seek my permission before use'
like you can actually post something useful ? i mean not counting adults and all but teenagers dont really post interesting stuff ? unless you're like uhmm some of my friends who post about food [read markyoung and samseng] and stuff or like me who wonders about life love and everything else honestly the rest is basically bullcrap about what you did in school today which retard pissed you off etc
and for us who DO post meaningful stuff we honestly dont care if you use it ? unless it's my work stuff like my stories and poems and stuff you can use it but like let me know or dump the link to my blog in your post give the blogger credit of course dont bother linking this blog though this one i use for rants about retards that screw up life which is basically ME hah
yeap this is another one of my random rants hah
off to explore changi now should i go to the OCGH ? hahah
so we said; thee, thee, hear. 17:26
desiree really knows how to pull a girl out of darkness hahah forget to mention that had heart to heart talk after K-ing with robin as a girl of course :P teehee
Imma tell you a story here it goes:
Listen, Let me say this face to face Before you walk away from me Listen up baby We know things ain't gunna change I love you but she's in the way Where does that leave me? woahh What a mess so wrapped up in you And theres nobody else for me In my heart I am so confused But I keep telling myself..
Forget you That's all I wanna do I gotta face the truth Cause this just ain't no good for me Forget you I really wish I could, get you off my mind As hard as I may try I cant forget you
I just gotta forget you
Bri talk to em Baby heres where i went wrong Thinkin I could have you Even though I knew the truth You were with somebody else Don't mean no disrespect But she aint got nothing on me woah woahhh What a mess wish that i could get over you My hearts tellin me to..
Forget you That's all I wanna do I gotta face the truth Cause this just ain't no good for me Forget you I really wish I could, get you off my mind As hard as I may try I cant forget you
Wish things were different but they're not You and I will never be And thats what is killing me Best thing for me to do is go and find somebody new But that wont happen till i forgeeeeeeeet you... do dah do do do do do
Forget you That's all I wanna do I gotta face the truth Cause this just ain't no good for me Forget you I really wish I could, get you off my mind As hard as I may try I cant forget you
And that's the story Now you know how I feel And that's all I gotta say
tell you something 11july coming i'm damn freaking scared just how scared ? scared enough that im damn close to using the f-wrd ): freeeeeeeeeeeeeeak sometimes i do wish my life wasn't so complicated that again its only as complicated as we make it out to be fag. i hate myself sometimes =/
tsk. did you know that the guy that sang "Always look on the bright side of life" committed suicide ? either its that guy or some other singer who sang an equally optimistic song hahah oh the irony
sometimes when i cross the road and a car comes i really want to stop walking and let it bang me down just to see if it'll hurt then there are days where i just want to jump out of the window so that i can 'fly' for like 1second hilarious much ? i've got like probably nothing much left to live for anyway living it day by day just trying to hang in there ohyeah i'm losing my mind i think i shall join robin in IMH
i suppose i can understand why robin went gay he got so sick of girls he decided 'screw girls, get me a guy' i get that too y'know ? if my next relationship [with a guy obviously] doesn't work out nicely i just might do that to whenever that[the relationship] is
then again God could be giving me a BIG FAT sign telling me to be a nun instead seeing how the guys he keep giving me are freaking assholes with exceptions though ahwell we'll see maybe twenty years down the road you'll see me in a habit with no hair hah !
so we said; thee, thee, hear. 16:42
had a fab friday night out it was celebration of my birthday, sammy's birthday and end of mid-years lol had so much freaking funnnnnn :D pity we can onl do more of it after O's ):
so anyway met robin sammy and marc at marinebowl poor marc was sickkkk ): xiaoweeeeeee get well soon alright ? and he still came ohmy =/ waited for desiree and edward to arrive edward called so went and meet him
did this freaking hilarious thing we were walking to marine bowl whn he suddenly put his arm around me and i put my arm around his waist and we walked in to the bowling alley like that making robin and sammy laugh like !@#$ hahah dumb wife
went to hk cafe to have dinner desiree came later on had dinner sent poor marc home ): walked to CSC to give chaufong his dinner
on the way dared each other to do stupid stuff sammy pretended to be some architect and ask some couple for their feedback about some weird building edward drew apparently he drew the TP library hahah edward talked to a dog-owner asking her if the dog was her bestie [wth?] i asked some random guy for his number lol robin whistled at some girl desiree being innocent had to pinch clement at the club hahah aww desssss :DD
headed to des house to sing K lol we all took turns to sing duets together LOL freaking funny sammy stayed at the club though ): edward left early daddy picked me and robin up at 1.30+++ sent robin home reached home at 2+ 3 hahah
best fun i had in years shall post the pictures when i get them rawr now back to mugging for O's ):
so we said; thee, thee, hear. 16:30
Sunday, 17 May 2009
zoieeeeeeeeeeee ! i got a song but i need someone to put down it's tuneeeeeeeeeeeeees pretty please be awesomely fantastic and be that someoneeeeeeeeee teehee
went to plazasing with dionne today remember the life-changing decision i said i made yeah well i did it i got a belly piercing :O shhhhhhhhhh dont scold me yeah you !
rawr. robin's first reaction was 'stupid girl' edward's was 'poke somemore hole larhhs. why ? got new bf already arh?' now im waiting for grace's reaction thn the scoldings will be complete(:
ohyeah i know you all too well
so we said; thee, thee, hear. 00:32
lol okay so i lied i said i would post the day after my birthday but i didn't but i have a good reason for lying i was busying being a good girl studying :D
hahah
anywayyyy thanks to everyone one who made my birthday special(: you know what's my favourite gift after all hahah just wish me happy birthday. you'll make me happy over the simple fact that you remembered thr was a downer though and im like really upset but it but i really should't be cause it'll be wallowing in self-pity
right back to the birthday itself
had lunch with dien and kaiyuan hahah crazy retards bully all the poor broadricians around went to leisure park had lunch at pastamania they bullied me ): they went and put tobasco sauce in my pasta when they knew i couldn't eat spicy food at all ass so i did the smartest thing(: i made dien trade with me cause kaiyuan had tobasco in his hahah
they brought me to coffeebean and bought me this raspberry cheesecake :DD and being retards starting singing the birthday song extremely loudly :O you can imagine how red my face was
headed upstairs to eat this chilli dog dien made me eat one mouthful and i started tearing super spicyyyyyyyyyyy DD:
hahah went home after that to go for tuition
jinren and mark gave me this cute teddy bear :DD hahah its on my bed now hahah with my other teddys haven't named it though. any ideas ?
zoie wrote this awesome song for me she and dionne sang it for me through th phone making me cryyyyyyyyy D: gahhhhhh i quote jeremy 'you guys are awesome !' hahah
having dinner this coming friday with robinnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn and edwardddddddddddd and sammyyyyyyyyyyy [maybe] hahah hope they can make it
robin i'm supposed to go that 'way' first . not you ?!
so we said; thee, thee, hear. 00:15
Wednesday, 13 May 2009
sweet sixteen ! ;DD
hahah will post more tomorrow alright ? hahah
so we said; thee, thee, hear. 22:48
Tuesday, 12 May 2009
had bio paper today zomg. i screwed up quite alot mannnnn D: studied hard yesterday died trying to explain chem to mark and pop
night time was studying bio suddenly kaiyuan called freeeeeeeak make me high only both of us went crazy and decided to call my naggy kor dien *duh* hahah needless to say all my efforts to study bio went down the drain hahah ahwell i suppose its alright since they're finally talking again
got me a little worried that they were fighting and refusing to talk to each other like a pair of nursery school kids and i felt so guilty thinking that it was all my fault cause of *censored secrets that you're not supposed to knw*
teehee bio paper 1 and emaths paper 1 tomorrow dien and kaiyuan coming to school :D yay hahah crap man wont be able to concentrate
after tht tuition thn maybe going for that thingy that i said was life-changing hahah !
i learnt an important life lesson today i learnt that 9/10 of guys are plain ass jerks the other 1/10 are either taken or just gays
now, ain't that just sad ? and here i was thinking that i'll be swept of my feet by Prince Charming one fine day someone burst the bubble i'm living in please
...
but then again is it that bad to dream of the impossible ? hahah i'm like thinking people like me are going to make their friends suffer badly shan't say why not here anyway hah if you're smart you'll figure out where(:
so we said; thee, thee, hear. 15:02
Monday, 11 May 2009
i just probably made one of the biggest life-changing decisions in my life or not hahah up to you to decide wont tell you wht is it not till i get it done tho hahah :D which might be friday i suppose :O
so we said; thee, thee, hear. 00:16
Saturday, 9 May 2009
papers i'm unfortunately left with
- English - Chinsese - Geography - Social Studies - Emaths - Biology - Chemistry - Physics
english was average chinese im screwed geog im dead ss was so-so ohmannnnn D:
"It's called 'soul murder'. That's what you're talking about, aren't you?" her hushed tones, afraid to break the silence. Amber eyes stare back at yours, waiting in anitcipation. You look at her, tears forming at the corner of your eyes, unable to answer her. "Oh god..." she whispered, reaching out to hold your now trembling form, "Oh god, my baby." She cries for you, crying the tears that you refuse to let go of, holding you tightly, as if you would slip away.
Than again, you might. Just so that it would all go away...
amusing how i can still come up with stuff especially when im supposed to be studying... i can like see those certain people shaking their heads at me now...
so we said; thee, thee, hear. 21:08
Tuesday, 5 May 2009
faggers should like just die. i think exams are getting on everyone's nerves people are like breaking up fighting PMS-ing [girls AND guys] wth man ?
i got like crap lot of revision incompleted geog i only finished 3/4 of ONE chapter i havent done any SS at all and my humans papers are on friday [yes BOTH papers , THIS friday . tell me how screwed am i .] SS teacher's a b-word the whole class wants to boycott SS exam hahah that will be like hilarious we're so gonna fail our SS O's if they dont change our teacher quick
im freaked by chem and physics paper i think my bio improved by a little weensy bit my emaths grade a going up by like 1cm [yay !] but im still screwed if they give me angles and circles and what-nots screw CL i shall focus on the EL :D hah ! i seriously and sincerly hope that i wont feel like not writing on EL paper cause if that happens i'll screw free-writing [paper 1] up which is like impossible to screw but i can actually screw :O hahah i failed my last compo [dressing] cause i didnt feel like writing :O rawr ! so pleaseohpleaseohplease lemme feel like writing on thursday so that i can rub it in *ahemahem* face :DD hahah screw her too :P
i said alot of screws in this post i should start saying nails or something ahahah it's the exams i lost my brains to talk like im smart :D hahah
markyoung took my chem mo-mo paper home D: i realised i wrote new crap on it and i wanted to continue D: tsk. but i guess it's good ? keep me focused to my geog textbook DD: yeah right
so we said; thee, thee, hear. 22:43
Monday, 4 May 2009
What we shared was no ordinary.. I feel the same until you had to go and stab my heart like What we share was no ordinary.. I feel the same until you had to go and stab my heart like OUCH!
Six thirty in the morning I've arrived early from tour Step into the house I'm walking up the stairs 1 step, 2 step, 3 step, 4 I'm on the second floor I'm opening the door, I could not brace myself for what I saw Who's this woman in my bed "Names Shaniqua and what" Na, Get the hell up off my baby
Now she the type of lady that every man needs, she's straight up feisty, She keeps me on my feet, but I don't wanna f**k things by sex There's some other hoe in our bed, what are you taking me for, To hell with you, to hell with me, Yeah I never wanna see your face again
Where the fuck do you think you is going I loved you so much but you cheated on me, What we shared was no ordinary, I feel the same until you had to go and just tear my heart like (ouch)
It use to be the other way around but, The story changed my heart is breaking, You need to recognize she was just a , (ahh) I think its time for me to go
Semi brown skin beauty had to get it back. I understand she's upset, she wants to kick and slap True say I'm from the slum, I wouldn't never stand for that Think underneath the bridge with that fake looking twat Now remember when we were financially unstable, Channel 1 to 5 no sky or cable, had to do some dirty work in order to be able To take care of you and put food on the table
Actions speak louder then words, I can't blame her for wanting the worse, She might be wishing that I'm dead, but i know she don't mean it, Think when i found those nikeys i couldn't believe it Remember when we had the feds knocking at our door You took care of the stash and hid the money from the draw You done the right thing, they had me up on the floor So you saved me from getting 5 years or more
Where the fuck do you think you is going I loved you so much but you cheated on me, What we shared was no ordinary, I feel the same until you had to go and just tear my heart like (ouch)
It use to be the other way around but, The story changed my heart is breaking, You need to recognize she was just a , (ahh) I think its time for me to go
See hows this suppose to solve the situation, When were both as stubborn as each other
We would argue for hours over something dumb "What the fuck" ssh. conversation done
Our ego trips never use to help us get nowhere, You should know this by now When you shout i smile, When you hit me i laugh, I get all cocky like bitch go run me a bath
So you wanna play it like that But baby i can get back You Dont wanna feel my Ouch Ouch Ouch Ive done it before, ill do it again Just Leave me alone..
Where the fuck do you think you is going I loved you so much but you cheated on me, What we shared was no ordinary, I feel the same until you had to go and just tear my heart like (ouch)
It use to be the other way around but, The story changed my heart is breaking, You need to recognize she was just a , (ahh) I think its time for me to go
truth in the lyrics much ?
brings alot of long forgotten memories back doesn't it ? hahah ahwell. i suppose i should really take my own advice sometimes. hahah . selective memory
so we said; thee, thee, hear. 19:10
Sunday, 3 May 2009
someone bring me go watch Harry Potter movie pretty pleasssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssse
i swear i haven't watch one in two years :O
be nice and make my day say you'll bring me on a date
hahah rhyming man !
but i dont want go with wifeeeeeeeee hahahah i owe him like 2 movie tickets and a meal i think :O omg i hate you wife . :D hahah not really larhhs actually i quite lurbblurbb euuxzx hahahah fickle-minded ?!
sister should really stop trying to seduce my wife he's mine okay! :D im so dumping you in IMH :DD and you should really go. why ? (: because i lurbb euu xDD
me : abnormal pig :D hahah i need a study buddy): you free? D: hahah abnormal pig : arr. i going cut hair. just wake up :D me : abnormal pig. :D after you cut hair? abnormal pig : dont know maybe go play me : rawr. ohwell. abnormal pig : haha feel lonely ar ? me : wait. i go one corner emo first thn tell you:D
ohman. the retarded conversations i can have... hahah
so we said; thee, thee, hear. 11:07
had a study session with htet yesterday lol freaking hilarious we were doing chem the mo-mo concept and he was like doing it all WRONG like he doesn't use the formulas at all and i was like struggling and struggling with the retarded formulas but he finished the freaking thing faster thn me and got the same retarded answers as me wth ? retarded man .
shuxin please shuddup . i know what you're thinking
anyways i like really wanna curse and swear at a certain couple *glares at them* muahahah
xinyi seriously tell me how many times did you really tell him how unhappy you are and thn tell me how many times did you think of how unhappy he was he called me up y'know ? i've heard his side of the story i haven't heard yours so i shall defend him first thn defend you after i hear from you(: :D ain't i nice ? right.
so judging by what he said and what i got from your blog problem one is the maple game
sooooooo on his part he should really stop playing and start going out with you on your part you should really stop inviting the whole world on your dates seriously even i'd get pissed if each time i went out with my guy he'd invite some retard that i've never seen and probably never will notice for the rest of my life and i'd probably name him 'the lightbulb guy that came on my date with my guy' for the rest of his pathetic life
of course he doesn't mind if you invite sara or me at least he knows us but c'mon dont invite some random person whom you know but he doesn't know
problem twoooooooo is shihyao ummm woman, are you really that blind ? yeah him and you are friends but C doesn't feel comfy that you're so close with each other can't you introduce them and go out together as a group sometime ? go with sara though(: hahah for the obvious reasons that i cant be bothered with you guys much :D basically when he tells you to stop contacting shihyao it means 'im scared he'd steal my girlf away.' unless you're really that blind and retarded [which you can be(:] you might want to consider making shihyao and C bestfriends(: you'd have an easier time as C would be able to trust him then
problem threee shouldn't really be a problem this time round i'd say you're just being paranoid c'mon i see him everyday in school and i haven't seen him sniffing around her at all he's deeply in love with you when i talk to him all i hear about is youyouyou so much that i actually get sick and tired of hearing about you honestly. stop being such a paranoid freak will ya ?
fourth problem.... i'd say you're an ass i mean wouldn't you get madddddd if he told you that he's tooo busy to talk to you but he has time to call up his friends to chat ? i would .
don't get me wrong im not on his side neither am i on yours i just want to settle your retarded problem and go sleeep cause i've not only lost my life im also sleep-deprived it's the fag O's i tell ya anyway that's my stand until you tell me what really happen im fair okay :D hahah loveya darlg(:
so we said; thee, thee, hear. 10:32
Friday, 1 May 2009
going shopping with mummy later gahhh its going to be longggggg cause you knw how picky i am with my clothes hahah i remember shopping for CNY clothes zomg. 3days and never buy anything imma genius. until last day thn go chiong hahah
stuying later. i shall do chem today you know, im like not following my study schedule at all i con mrLau's feelings man hahah ! but he also keep conning ours . :P will be going to send zhengyuan off at 9 D: whyyyyyyy ? must think of us often okay ? :D hahah
my essay is still waiting to be read D: zomg. why so slowwwwww ? ugh . suspense is killing me man....
didnt go for marcus chua's party hah i think if i went i'd feel out-of-place ? couldn't be bothered too unfortunately :X hahah
I want a little something more Don't want the middle or the one before I don't desire a complicated past I want a love that will last
Say that you love Say i'm the one Don't kiss and hug me and then try to run I don't do drama My tears don't fall fast I want a love that will last
I don't want a just a memory Gives me forever Don't even think about saying good-bye Cuz i want just one love to be enough And remain in my heart till i die
So call me romantic Oh i guess that must be so Theres something more that you oughta know I'll never leave you So don't even ask I want a love that will last
Forever I want a love that will last I want a love that will last
I don't want a just a memory Gives me forever Don't even think about saying good-bye Cuz i want just one love to be enough And remain in my heart till i die
So there's little more that i need I wanna share all the air you breathe I'm not the kinda girl to complicate the past I want a love that will last
Forever I want a love the love that last Always I just want a love that will last Want a love that will last
don't we all ? hahah
been reading the newspaper quite a bit i think im under FatherSimon's influence now cause everytime i read something bad straight away my mind thinks why does he/she/these things happen thn it goes on and on and on ........