Friday, 30 April 2010

so many things i want to tell you
but i can't even look at you in the eye
so it's best if i kept my mouth shut

the things you do for them
why do you not do them for me?
i bet
you can't even tell what i left behind

everything's changing again
if only time can turn back
maybe this time
i'll run
far away
cause i'm sick
and tired
of competing
against two things i know i can never win
the computer
and the friends you hold so dearly

i keep getting the feeling
that i made a mistake
its small
and repairable
but a mistake nonetheless

maybe
just maybe
i should have chosen the other road instead

i am now learning
'sorry' don't actually make up for anything
unless you make good on it
unless you mean it
unless you can be sure it wont ever happen again
otherwise 'sorry, i'll change'
doesn't mean anything at all

i am now learning
exactly how much i really mean to you

so we said; thee, thee, hear. 00:07

Thursday, 29 April 2010

when i said, "i need a hug."
and she replied, "honey, everyone does."
she wasn't lying

have you ever just held someone?
not because the person was a special someone
or because you wanted to comfort the person.
it isn't because you haven't seen the person in a long while
and it wasn't a hi-i-missed-you-haven't-seen-you-in-a-while-now-and-after-this-i'm-just-gonna-disappear-from-your-pathetic-sad-life-hug too.

it was just a hug.
not thoughts, no meaning, no nothing.
just a hug.
to revel in the human contact.

humans, are social butterflies
even the loner in the corner has friends
you just don't see them cause they're all online

humans, crave for another human
they crave for the speech
they crave for movement
they crave for contact

above all
humans,
crave for the human touch

an accidental bump
a friendly peck on the cheek
a hand held
a hug

in the times when i'm down and out
i crave for a hug
more then how i crave for chocolates
in such times
i hate people blabbering on and on about things
my current state of mind is too irrational to understand
in such times
i crave for a hug

i think that's why i like you so much
because when i'm in that state of mind
all you do is hug me
no questions asked.

so we said; thee, thee, hear. 01:03

Monday, 26 April 2010

i can tell you all my dirty secrets
but you will never keep them

fear bites the core of your soul
and no matter how many times you chant your secret chant
it'll never work
because the fear will just come back to haunt you
tear up your soul
and leave you in desperate little pieces

i wonder why
if he loved us so much
why does he make us go through so much
isn't once enough?
why another time?
questioning my faith again
trying to find a semblence of sanity in it
wondering why despite it all
i still trust him

so we said; thee, thee, hear. 23:37

Wednesday, 21 April 2010

if i could write down every thought that went through my mind
we would have a tragic comedy right now

honestly i have so many lines
running around my head all the time
it gives me headaches
i should've been born as shakespeare's son or something
but then again
it's i should have
hahah
too many new ideas for new stories
too little time to write them down
ugh.

so we said; thee, thee, hear. 23:14

Sunday, 18 April 2010

won't you come out and see the play
that the stars have put on for us?

sometimes i wonder what the stars would say
if they could speak

would they laugh?
at our foolishness?

or would they cry?
because of what we've done?

God only knows.

today i walked down that road
where we left each other that night
i think i was the only one who looked back
to see if you were perhaps
standing there watching me leave
but then again
i expected no less of you
because if you were there
you wouldn't be you

so we said; thee, thee, hear. 19:32

Thursday, 15 April 2010

sometimes, you feel like curling up in a dark hole
and never come out again.
but that's just sometimes

you came
even though you couldn't
that's what counts

wishing that i could just die
never really works
but honestly
sometimes it feels like i've got nothing left to live for
and like i said
sometimes.

sometimes, i wonder why i like to pick a fight with you
like you've done nothing wrong
but caught me in a bad mood
and i wonder why you still put up with me
even though i always make you moody too
then i wonder how long more
before you're going to snap
and leave me here
with my temper tantrums
and black mood
finally i wonder
if you are even seeing this at all

so we said; thee, thee, hear. 00:31

Monday, 12 April 2010

i guess i finally got over the fact that
you're a normal person
just like everyone else

okay im better
cos i lurve me lovely
hahaha
anyhoos
busy week ahead.
no difference actually

hmm
i realised that guys
are becoming more and more predictable
...
gosh
boring much?
hahah or maybe its just me
with my head up in the clouds again

played chess online with baby
i won :D
i own him :D
heehee
read this you smelly ass
I OWN YOU
:DD

so we said; thee, thee, hear. 01:12

Sunday, 11 April 2010

it sounds real cheesy but i mean it when i say,
"only you can make me feel this way"

i have a sudden urge to be hugged by you
to hear your heartbeat
to feel your warmth

i can still smell you on me
even though i've shower
and i scrubbed real hard

it that normal?
or am i just crazy?

oh and by the way
i still need your pillow
because it seems i can only fall asleep on that.

someone asked me what kind-of guys do i like
i described you
unknowingly
somehow you've become irreplaceable
and yet
i'm still doing stupid things to make you push me away
why, i wonder.

i am going for a hair cut tomorrow
with grace
wonder how that will turn out
*evil laughter*

so we said; thee, thee, hear. 03:16

Wednesday, 7 April 2010

"i guess i just dont like seeing people suffer"

hush up. dry the already dried tears.
there's nothing left.
only a broken heart
and a torn soul.

so we said; thee, thee, hear. 02:16

Tuesday, 6 April 2010

gather your friends close; she said,
because Judas is amongst them

Easter.
and yet nobody really seems to notice.
hmm.
hypocritical.
sometimes, you really want to slap yourself
for making the mistake of trusting them.

so we said; thee, thee, hear. 00:42

Saturday, 3 April 2010

sometimes, you can feel so unbearably lonely
even though you're surrounded by millions of people.

rome introduced to me this blogger
who writes like awesome-ly
hahahah
his webbie if you're interested - I Wrote This For Masako

anyway, hopes things get better >.<

shuxin decided to go malaysia
dumb woman
everytime got interesting things happen
she go malaysia -.-
next time got interesting things happen for you
i go other countries to uh. :P

so we said; thee, thee, hear. 17:27

Friday, 2 April 2010

cause everytime she cuts you
im bleeding

rawr. i wish i can take you away
and hide you somewhere
that nobody can find you
and steal you
and hurt you
):

but you're not mine to keep
and i have not right to stake a claim
so we're stuck in this mess
where im asking all the whys
and you dont seem to see what's already in front of you

im selfish and bitchy i suppose
and i keep making selfish decisions
when what you really need right now
is rational thoughts

this is a weird triangle
it shouldnt be here at all
a horrible secret im keeping
a terrible temptation of the future

i think i should leave
before anyone gets hurt
i shouldnt talk to you anymore
because im a traitor to another

would it be wrong to say that
when you came to me i was happy?
i felt special and horrible
a mash of emotions everywhere?

would you still come
if you knew?
what im doing is actually
horribly selfish ?

then again
my secret
kept from everyone
i cant tell a soul
or everything will be spoilt
and we don't want that now, do we?

love's a bitch right now

so we said; thee, thee, hear. 01:24

Thursday, 1 April 2010

everybody's everywhere =/
i did something bad
very bad.
but i made right again.
so im forgiven right ?

Because, sweetheart,
You’re the knight in shining amour
You should have a princess
And a happy-ever-after
- angelindenial

so we said; thee, thee, hear. 15:48